I wrote this some time ago. I meant to include it in the blog, but I never finished it. I suppose it might as well publish it here. It was never fully completed...
Just when you thought the world and his dog had gotten sick of my TV theme postings, yes, here comes another one! I do enjoy writing these. I received a collection of CD themes from none other than Andy The Iridium Fan, in the form of a CD entitled "Favourite TV Themes", released on the Music Club record label, similar to what my last theme CD review was.
If I don't change that introduction between now and pressing publish, that's an awful introduction and I do apologise for it. Anyway, same format applies. I type about a song until it ends.
01. Inspector Morse / South Bank OrchestraI'm pretty sure this wasn't the version used in the show, but I'm not even sure if there was a "master" version, or they just re-recorded it for every few episodes with a new arrangement.
02. The Ruth Rendell Mysteries / Brian BennettAnd this is where the CD shows its age already. I believe it was released originally in 1992, and this show was probably popular then. I do remember the theme though.
03. Upstairs Downstairs / "Original TV Soundtracks" I'm a bit dubious as to the authenticity of this one. It could have been just an tagging error why whoever tagged it originally, but not giving the original artist doesn't fill me with conficence that this is the real deal. Sounds a bit too clean too. Anyway, I never watched the show, so I'm not really bothered. It clocks in at 3:15, but it feels like more. Really not my type of music.... and that ending just doesn't fit at all. Maybe I'll check Youtube.
04. The Seven Faces of Woman (She) / Peter SkellernThe Charles Aznavour classic, resung by someone who I've never heard of, from a show that I've never seen. Passable.
05. Agatha Christie's Poirot / Chris GunningAh, the first track on the CD I'm very familiar with. Daddykins loves this prog, and has it as a "Record Series" on the old Sky+, meaning that the hard drive quickly fills up with David Suchet knocking out Belgian accents and dodgy moustaches as if it was the Art Deco Period. This theme, being 2:17 in length, has an odd middle bit where everything goes up a half-key, and then back down towards the end. Authentic enough, and although I'm pretty sure the version on the show had a different ending, it's still enough.
06. A Woman of Subatance / London Film OrchestraAgain, a show I'm not familiar with in the slightest, so had to head off to IMDB. a 1984 mini series, with original music by Nigel Hess, the star of the previous CD. Not sure if this was the version used on the show.
07. Tales of the Unexpected / Ron GrainerLet's all dance in front of the fire for this one! I must admit, despite this being an apparent stalwart of the ol' Telly Theme Tune CD, I've only heard the full version of this in dodgy MP3 format, so it's nice to hear it a bit clearer. It's an odd theme with plenty of odd instruments you just can't put your finger on identifying. A top tune.
08. The Professionals / Laurie JohnsonHeard the phrase "Needs more cowbell?" This actually couldn't be further from the truth in this case. 46 seconds into it, the "orchestra" simultaneously drop acid, and all hell breaks loose. It sounds like three Swedish porn soundtracks being played simultaniously. If that's the version used on the show, I'll heat my cat.
09. Goal Crazy / Rod Argent + Peter Van HookeOk, I don't think I've ever heard a bad ITV Sports theme, and this one is no exception. Though I'll be surprised if anyone but me and Mr Argent and Van Hooke actually remember it. It was used between 1990 and 1992. I actually spent years looking for this. I liked it mainy because it was so rare, having only really been used between the 1990 World Cup, and the 1992 Euro Championships. It's one of those sports themes that slipped under the cracks. It's very similar to RA/PVH's contribution to the 1986 World Cup, a track called "Aztec Gold", which ITV used for many years, and way have even outlived this theme.
It's one of three RA/PVH tracks on here.
10. The Avengers / South Bank OrchestraI don't think this one's genuine. Although I recognise the theme, I don't recognise that trumpet intro.
11. Forever Green / Patric GowersHahahaha! Hahaha! Hhhahaaaa! Oh my. I've just laughed beer through my nose. Not because of the theme, but because the show featured Wendy van der Plank, who you may remember as Wizadora, and someone who has one of the best names in the history of all time. IMDB lists her birthday as August 1979, which makes her 4 months older than me... which means that when she filmed Wizadora, she was 13...
12. The New Adventures of Black Beauty / South Bank OrchestraI'm still confused about this "South Bank Orchestra". Noticeable master tape dropout 12 seconds into this, suggests to me that this could be an old recording. Utterly, utterly out-of-time kettle-drum beat 1:38 into it, no mention of the original title's track of "Galloping Home" suggest that it's a re-recording. It's that long since it's been on telly that I don't realy think it matters.
13. Chimera (Rosheen Du) / ChameleonI have no idea what this high-pitched wailing is all about.
14. London's Burning / Rowland Rivron + Simon BrintHa! For a second there, I though that said Rowland Rivr.... wait. Rowland Rivron? *THE* Rowland Rivron?
Yes, dear viewers. For you see, according to Wikipedia,
Rowland Rivron and Simon Brint formed a band called "Raw Sex"., though I doubt that'd look good in the credits of the regular Sunday night death-o-thon.
See? These reviews are also educational!
15. Dr. Who / Ron Grainer I'm not overly sure which incarnation of the Dr. Who theme this is, as there's been 16 billion of them.
16. The One Game (Saylon Dola) / ChameleonChameleon's second appearance in 4 tracks. This isn't so much a theme, more of a wailing session, more like the previous track of theirs.
17. Tutti Al Mondo / Rod Argent + Peter Van HookeUnfortunately abandoned ITV theme from their 1990 World Cup Coverage, totally overshadowed by BBC's use of Pavarotti's "Nessun Dorma", this theme was used for the world cup, and then sank without trace. Both the BBC and ITV themes were released as singles. Pavarotti reached No. 2 in the carts while this managed to sell 2 copies. Probable slight exaggeration there. Learning from their mistakes, this was the last comissioned World Cup theme of the 1990s, with "Gloryland" by Darryl Hall being used for ITVs 1994 coverage, and an Apollo 440 remix of a Jean Michelle Jarre track being used in 1998.
